Author Interview: Shannon Dittemore

Shannon was one of the first published authors to befriend me when I first came onto the writing scene. I was excited to find out that we live in the same area, so it made it easier for us to become instant friends. We spoke a few times through emails and Twitter, of course, and we met in person at a writing conference in our town. Since then we've spoken on many occasions and I can definitely tell you that her friendship is a blessing. So when Life of Writers came up with this feature, I knew immediately who would be my first pick. I'm even more thrilled that it happened around the time that she just released her second book in the Angels Eyes Trilogy. Now that I've told you how wonderful she is, I think it's time you found out yourselves.

I know how excited I am about BROKEN WINGS coming out this month, but how are YOU feeling? Does it get easier as each book is released into the wild? 

You know that moment in Armageddon where AJ asks Oscar how he's doing? Here, this moment: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=imH1B_4Ge6w Oscar about nails it. I'm 98% excited, 2% scared. Or maybe it's the other way around. Who knows? If this release week is anything like the last one, it'll be a very topsy turvy emotional ride for me. And that's okay. It's probably good. Makes me feel victorious when it's over. The best part of this next week will be Saturday (2/23) when I get to celebrate the launch at Barnes and Noble with other readers. I'm very much looking forward to that. I don't know if it gets any easier as time goes by. I will certainly let you know!

In ANGEL EYES (Book 1 of the trilogy) we are shown a fantastical world mixed with real life situations. Can we expect the same from BROKEN WINGS?

Yes. Absolutely. I wanted Broken Wings to be the next logical step for Brielle and her friends. Brielle's father is the source of a lot of drama in this one. And then, of course, there are some returning demons and angels with wings of blade. The goal has always been to show everyday life existing alongside the supernatural. I hope it makes for an exciting ride.

I've seen the pin board filled with colorful flash cards in your office, and as a pantser, I must know: How do you keep yourself from feeling overwhelmed by all the outlining? 

Well, I should probably confess here. I'm a half-pantser. Most of my flash cards go up on the board after a chapter is written, not before. Occasionally, I'll pin a card with a couple details scribbled on it to remind me what comes next, but mostly I use the boards to remind me where I've been. I don't do a formal outline. I usually write a bit and then outline the next few chapters, and then write a bit more and adjust from there. Obviously, OBVIOUSLY, I'm still learning, but I'd rather the characters tell me what happens next. That only happens when I let them run around and talk to each other.

What's your process like when you're on a deadline? How do you keep yourself on track? 

I'm going to have to confess everything to you, aren't I? That's okay. You're awesome and I don't mind. The truth is, I'm usually always behind. But the reason I know that is because I set a weekly word count goal. Say 10,000 words a week. Now, I miss my goal lots, but the idea is that if I've hit it by Friday, (WAHOO!) I get the weekend off. If not, Saturday and Sunday are catch-up days for me. Sometimes I let myself cheat and skip catch-up days. Makes me feel like a rebel, but I always know just how far behind I am and how many words it will take to catch up.   

As I understand, you just turned in your edits for DARK HALO (Book 3). How does it feel to be nearing the end of your first trilogy? 

Weird! It's very weird. It's fulfilling to know I've told this entire story, wrapping it up exactly the way I wanted to. That's an amazing feeling. But it doesn't feel like the end of these characters. I don't know if I'll write them again, but I think they'll always be alive in my head, wandering around, doing what they do. That's the part that's weird. That these characters will do things in my imagination that no one will ever know about. It'll take some getting used to, I think.

For your last question, I have to ask: What super "secret" thing can you tell us about yourself and your writing? 

I don't know how super secret it is; my neighbors are all highly aware. But when I'm stuck or need to think through an idea, I walk around and around my court. I wave at the kids, rile up the dogs, smell the roses, so to speak. Usually I'm wearing sweats and only my socks--I've destroyed oodles of them, btw--but it helps me to GET OUT. I love my writing cave, but there's only so much inspiration to be derived from my bookshelves and bulletin boards. So there you have it: I walk in circles! Now you know all my secrets.

Just to prove how awesome she is, Shannon has offered to giveaway a copy of BROKEN WINGS which is now available in stores! To enter, please see the Rafflecopter below. You have until March 7th to enter! 

Thank you so much to Shannon Dittemore for this fabulous giveaway! 

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Shannon Dittemore has an overactive imagination and a passion for truth. Her lifelong journey to combine the two is responsible for a stint at Portland Bible College, performances with local theater companies, and a focus on youth and young adult ministry. The daughter of one preacher and the wife of another, she spends her days imagining things unseen and chasing her two children around their home in Northern California. 

SeCrit #3 (First 250 Words)

Title: SIGHTLESS

Genre: YA Urban Fantasy

A warm flush crept up Carly’s neck and onto her face as the crowd in the Flying Owl pressed in on her, their sweat and perfume becoming her own. She edged her way through the throng, pressing against damp backs and oversized purses until she came to a clearing near the bar. Leaning against the wall, she wiped her forehead. Her fingers came away shiny with sweat and make-up.

The voices around her morphed into a single yell as the band walked on stage. Carly tried to catch Tyler’s eye, but he bent over his amp, a crease between his eyes. She knew that nervous look, and it twisted her insides to see it now.

Despite the heat, a cool tingle crept up Carly’s spine. The people around her were looking everywhere but at her, but she couldn’t shake the feeling that she was being watched. She wrapped her arms around herself and searched the crowd. A moment later, the sea of people parted, and Carly locked eyes with a woman leaning against the bar.

Carly searched her face for some sign of familiarity. The woman stood up straight, and Carly saw that she was wearing skintight leather pants, a low-cut red shirt, and black, high-heeled boots. Hardly the wardrobe of a security guard.

           The corners of the woman’s mouth slowly curled into a knowing smile. Carly shivered. A yell went up around her and the crowd closed in around Carly once more.

 Critique:

A warm flush crept up Carly’s neck and onto her face as the crowd in the Flying Owl pressed in on her, their sweat and perfume becoming her own. She edged her way through the throng, pressing against damp backs and oversized purses until she came to a clearing near the bar. Leaning against the wall, she wiped her forehead. Her fingers came away shiny with sweat and make-up. Okay, here's what I get from this first paragraph: She's in a bar and it's hot. The setting itself is fine, but pretty much every sentence mentions or alludes to sweat. To me, that's over-describing just one aspect of the setting. What does this bar and its people feel like, not just physically, but what is the vibe? I get that the bar is packed, but from this description, I imagine a lot of sweaty people standing around. Is that what's happening? I would expect there to be a lot of talking, yelling for drinks, maybe dancing? Also, what is she doing there? I know you start to tell us that in the next paragraph, but you have plenty of opportunity to do it now and really hook me.

The voices around her morphed into a single yell as the band walked on stage. Carly tried to catch Tyler’s eye, but he bent over his amp, a crease between his eyes (do you mean “between his eyebrows”? Between his eyes seems awkward to me. Also, I wouldn't mind a tiny bit more description of Tyler here. Especially if he's the love interest ;) ). She knew that nervous look, and it twisted her insides to see it now. (I like this. I think it shows a lot about the character and the situation in few words. Well done.)

Despite the heat, a cool tingle crept up Carly’s spine. The people around her were looking everywhere but at her, but she couldn’t shake the feeling that she was being watched. She wrapped her arms around herself and searched the crowd. A moment later, the sea of people parted, and Carly locked eyes (“locked eyes” is kind of a cliché saying. Try using your voice to put your own spin on this, maybe?) with a woman leaning against the bar.

Carly searched (watch out for repeating words) her face for some sign of familiarity. The woman stood up straight, and Carly saw that she (you don't really need to tell us this. We know Carly's the one doing the seeing) was wearing (instead of "was wearing" how about "wore"?) skintight leather pants, a low-cut red shirt, and black, high-heeled boots. Hardly the wardrobe of a security guard. (Why are we assuming she's a security guard? This sentence seems to come out of nowhere.)

           The corners of the woman’s mouth slowly curled into a knowing smile. Carly shivered (I feel like I want more here as to why Carly is creeped out by this woman. She doesn't seem too creepy to me.). A yell (I highlighted “yell” here and earlier because you use it for the same thing. I want more of your voice, more description. Was it a frenzied scream? A collective chant of the band's name?) went up around her and the crowd closed in around Carly once more.

Notice how many times the character's name is said? This is one of those things I find tricky about third person. Knowing when to use the character's name and when not to. I think you've used it too much here. 

So, there you have it folks. Thanks to everyone who submitted and special thanks to the author of this submission! I think you have a great start, you just need to allow yourself to embellish, have fun with the words! And remember, folks, we want to encourage all of you to add your own thoughts in the comments!

And the Narwhalicorn Goes To...

Thanks so much to everyone who participated in my Super Secret Giveaway this weekend! Your secrets were downright amazing, and I had a blast. I hope you did too.

That being said, the almighty Rafflecoptor widget has spoken, and the winner of THE ARCHIVED by Victoria Schwab, the Narwhalicorn, and a super secret random prize is....

Annette Prejean

WOOT. Congratulations! Please email me here. I'll need your address so I can send your super awesome stuff. Enjoy!

xo.

Andrea's Friday Giveaway: Tell Us Your Secrets

I've been thinking a lot about secrets lately. Some of that has to do with this here blog theme, of course, but some of it has to do with my own writing and the books I've been reading lately.

So I want to share some of my secrets with you. And also give you free stuff. 

You guys in? Sweet. Let me tell you how it works.

THE GIVEAWAY: 

Until 11:59 P.M. EST on Saturday, I'll be running a Twitter giveaway. To enter, tweet one of your secrets about anything at all (writing related or not) with the hashtag #secretgiveaway. 

HOWEVER, you must enter your tweet through the Rafflecoptor widget below in order to officially enter. Repeat: You must enter your tweet through the Rafflecoptor widget below in order to officially enter.  Rafflecoptor keeps track of all those entries, not me, so if you want some kick ass swag, make sure the widget knows. If you'd like to RT my tweets to spread the word, that would be fab and I'd love you forever, but go ahead and enter here too, k? Also, the giveaway only applies to U.S. residents. Sorry, international friends. 

Don't have Twitter? Bummer. But don't worry! You can easily make an account and tweet your secret (still counts!). Then go follow The Secret Life of Writers. 

I'll be sharing some of my secrets throughout the day, so I hope you'll join me! 

THE PRIZES:

I'm giving away the book I'm currently reading and am loooving right now. I love it so much that I want to share it with you.

THE ARCHIVED by Victoria Schwab

BUT WAIT THAT'S NOT ALL. Also, a Narwhalicorn. (I know, right?)

BUT WAIT THAT'S STILL NOT ALL. Also, I'm adding in a super secret bonus prize. Nope, I'm not telling you what it is. You'll have to enter to win. 

This giveaway is our chance to get to know you guys, but it's also a thank you. Thank you for reading each week, and thanks for supporting this blog. We love you! Now go enter and win yourself some super swag. 

a Rafflecopter giveaway

The Secrets to Writing a Book Under Contract

So this is the first book I've written under contract, and I wanted to share my findings and experience with you all. Where else than on, uh, Secret Life of Writers? Anyway, the first tip:

Don't think about everyone else.

This is number one for me. Seriously. If I'm not careful, the pressure gets to me. And the truth is, the pressure is all my own. I'm not getting e-mails from my agent or my editor, urging me on or demanding to see anything. I still have time. But as writers, we have bone-deep desires to create a good story and to make our readers happy. Or at least make them affected by what we've written. There's something a little extra, a little more difficult about creating this under official circumstances. During my panic moments (and believe me, there are those moments, no matter how much I try to avoid them) I think, So this kind of HAS to be good. There's no other option. It's thoughts like this that we need to crush beneath our heels. We are writers, and we can do this, and all that matters is what words we want to put to the page. Not what the world wants us to put to the page.

Let your characters surprise you.

Usually if you're writing a book under contract, you've handed in a synopsis or at least a brief summary. So people have a good idea of where this story is going and what it's going to be about. The thing about stories, though, is they never turn out the way you think they're going to. Feel free to let circumstances take an unexpected twist. Make that character turn to the dark side, let those two people come together, allow a moment to creep into the chapter that wasn't mentioned in any e-mails or summaries or conversations. More often than not, it's the unexpected writing that becomes the most effective. 

Don't talk about it.

So this blog post kind of blatantly goes against this. But it's a lesson I've learned the hard way. I discovered that if I babble about a book while I'm in the midst of writing it, problems surface. Sometimes the person I'm talking to will offer an opinion. "I think this should happen" or "I don't like that". Being a people-pleaser, I begin to reconsider my own decisions and words. Granted, this might be a good thing during revisions. During the turmoil of writing the first draft, though? No. It's just bad. Also, another side effect to this: I lose steam. This might be a Kelsey quirk, but if I go into too much detail to someone about what the book is about and what happens, I get bored and begin to cheat on it with other, mysterious and intriguing ideas. So I find it's best to just give people a mischievous smile when they ask me about the new book.

Kelsey Sutton has done everything from training dogs, making cheeseburgers, selling yellow page ads, and cleaning hotel rooms. Now she divides her time between her full-time college classes and her writing, though she can also sometimes be found pounding out horrible renditions of Beethoven on the piano and trying bizarre drinks at her local coffee shop. Kelsey lives in northern Minnesota with her dog and cat, Lewis and Clark. She is represented by Beth Miller of Writer's House, and her debut YA novel SOME QUIET PLACE is forthcoming from Flux in 2013. You can add it on Goodreads here!

You can also find her on Twitter @: https://twitter.com/KelseyJSutton
Drop her an email @: kelseyjsutton@gmail.com
And visit her on her blog at www.kelseysutton.blogspot.com

Stefanie's Creative Writing Prompt

Hey all! Got another creative writing prompt for everyone today :) If you missed the last one, here's how it works: below is something meant to inspire a short bit of free-writing. In my case, it's a picture I took a while back while on vacation. I'll post what I came up with based on the picture, and then you guys do the same and post it on your blog, and then come back and share your link to your wonderful writing in the comments section. Fun, right? Right.

And this IS supposed to be fun--don't think too hard about it, in other words. The idea is just to get the words flowing, however crappy they end up being (and mine's pretty crappy, haha).

So without further ado...inspiration! GO!

And my quick piece:

The only reason I've decided to attend my father's funeral is so that I can be certain he is truly dead. 

I have been steeling my stomach all morning for this moment, for those steps that I will have to take up to the coffin, for the way I will have to just ever-so-casually peer in and see his face. Closed eyes, powdered skin, rouged cheeks. I've seen so many dead, painted faces at this point, and I know they never do anybody justice. You can't imitate life, no matter how thick and fancy you pile on the makeup. And that is what I'm afraid of. 

I am afraid that the man in the coffin out there will be unrecognizable now, even to his only daughter. 

Nine years, twenty-seven days. That's how long it's been. A lot's changed. If the undertaker had come to me and said Now, how shall we arrange him? Peaceful smile? Stern lips? Furrowed brow? I would have laughed. And then I would have said Your guess is as good as mine. All I know is he hasn't been smiling peacefully or furrowing his brows at me lately.  

Which I suppose is why I have yet to go into the main part of the church with the rest of the mourners. Instead I am standing in this dark little room, arms hugged to my chest, eyes drawn to the sole bit of cold, indifferent light that's seeping in through the dusty window above.

Stefanie Gaither writes YA novels about killer clones and spaceships, with the occasional romp with dragons and magic-users thrown in for good measure. Said writing is generally fueled by an obscene amount of coffee and chocolate, as well as the occasional tennis and/or soccer break. She's represented by Sara Megibow of Nelson Literary, and her debut novel, FALLS THE SHADOW, is forthcoming from Simon and Schuster Books For Young Readers in 2014.

You can find her on Twitter @: https://twitter.com/stefaniegaither

Or drop her an email at: stefanie.gaither@gmail.com

And also visit her website @: www.stefaniegaither.com 

Author Interview: Ashley Elston

Today, we have the lovely Ashley Elston here for a quick interview. I gotta say, I'm sooo excited for her book, THE RULES FOR DISAPPEARING!

Hi Ashley, could you tell us a little about yourself and your book so we can get to know you?

 

I’m married with three sons and live in North Louisiana. I was a wedding/portrait photographer for 10 years and now, when I’m not writing, I help my husband run our landscape business. My book is about a family stuck in the Witness Protection Program and they get relocated to Louisiana. That poor family has been through so much and I’m afraid it’s not getting any easier for them.

 

What made you want to write this book?

 

I had the idea for this book and it just wouldn’t go away. I kept thinking how hard it would be for a girl in high school to have to hide who she really was. 

 

What was your journey to becoming represented then published like?

 

When I set out to find an agent, I had no idea just how hard it would be. You need a pretty thick skin when you start querying. Luckily, my story caught the eye of a fantastic agent, Sarah Davies. I thought the hard work was done until I got her email detailing all the revisions she would like me to make. So I went to work. And it paid off. I was thrilled to get a two book deal with Disney Hyperion.

 

Can you tell us what's next for you? Are you working on anything new that you can reveal?

 

I just finished the first draft to the sequel for THE RULES FOR DISAPPEARING and sent it to my editor. I’m really excited about where this story is going.

 

And finally, what do you love most about being an author?

 

Really, what’s been so incredible is when I hear from a reader and realize they love my characters as much as I do. It’s very humbling.

Thanks for stopping by, Ashley! Your book sounds amazing! Plus, there will be a sequel?! Score!

 She’s been six different people in six different places: Madeline in Ohio, Isabelle in Missouri, Olivia in Kentucky . . . But now that she’s been transplanted to rural Louisiana, she has decided that this fake identity will be her last.

Witness Protection has taken nearly everything from her. But for now, they’ve given her a new name, Megan Rose Jones, and a horrible hair color. For the past eight months, Meg has begged her father to answer one question: What on earth did he do – or see – that landed them in this god-awful mess? Meg has just about had it with all the Suits’ rules — and her dad’s silence. If he won’t help, it’s time she got some answers for herself.

But Meg isn’t counting on Ethan Landry, an adorable Louisiana farm boy who’s too smart for his own good. He knows Meg is hiding something big. And it just might get both of them killed. As they embark on a perilous journey to free her family once and for all, Meg discovers that there’s only one rule that really matters — survival.

THE RULES FOR DISAPPEARING will be out on May 14, 2013, so go check it out on Goodreads and get ready for the awesomeness!

And follow Ashley to keep up with news and for more general awesomeness!
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Andrea's SeCrit: A YA Fantasy Query

[NOTE: I have no idea why some of the font below is gray, and some is black. So sorry. I tried to fix it forever and gave up.] 

Hey, everyone! 

I'll be heading up this round of SeCrits, and I've decided to critique a query this week. I actually like query writing (please don't murder me) so I'd thought I'd help out a reader in this department.

A couple of reasons why I chose the query below: 

• It's structurally sound overall, but it still needs a bit of work. 
Basically, I felt like I could help really tighten this up and polish it with word choice and fluency, which is my strength as a writer, I think.
• It's not a genre I usually read. I don't read a lot of fantasy, but in this case, that's good! Since I'm not really familiar with the nuances of the genre, I think I'm more likely to point out areas that don't make sense to us fantasy noobs, which I think will help the whole thing get clearer.
• I immediately had ideas how to fix it. This one's pretty self-explanatory. 

[But here's the thing: If you submitted a query to me, I read through them all. I'll also be emailing you all back about your queries and offering love/compliments/maybe a few simple suggestions to help you out. WOOT.] 

So now, on to the query + crit!

Dear Super Fantastic Agent, 

Sera is the heiress to the throne in a different dimension, but no one told her.  Consequently, she’s living a normal—albeit, boring—life, and then she’s whisked away by a (very rich and very attractive) guy, who then turns out to be an incubus, working for an evil queen, who is also Sera’s mother. 

Sera’s ‘parents’ also forgot to mention they’re actually rebels from Naian—the dimension Sera should be ruling—who stole her when she was an infant.  Oh, and there’s this ‘Foretelling,’ something Lucifer made up giving Sera the sole power to decide the outcome of Naian’s civil war.  Too bad everyone believes it’s true and is therefore trying to either kiss her ass or kill her. 

While she’s on this self-discovery kick, she also learns that she has an alien guy fetish.  First the incubus, then her rebel friend, Lux, who she meets on an interdimensional race against the regime for an explanation of the Foretelling.  Between solving riddles, facing monsters, traipsing all over hell, and surviving the attacks of Queen Anicetus’ vicious incubus, Sera and Lux get pretty hot for each other.
But, that’s the other problem.  The incubus.  The dark, sarcastic, damn-near-invincible incubus who oozes sex appeal and never loses.  His name is Lord Caden, and he has a thing for Sera. 

Though she’d rather not, Sera does have to choose between them—between Lux and Lord Caden, between the rebellion and the crown.  To some, it’d be obvious: monstrous regime = no go.  But Sera’s still a little annoyed with the people who lied to her for eighteen years, and there’s also the Lux/Lord Caden thing, which she would love to write off as an unimportant factor in deciding the fate of an entire world, but she can’t.  Her morality, her friendships, her future, and the liberation of a dimension may be at stake here, but Sera doesn’t know if she can resist Lord Caden. 

SHADOW is a YA fantasy complete at 97K, and it is the first in a planned series.
I am a black belt and a barista.  I also write stories for local papers in western Montana, and I attended the Backspace Writers Conference last year.  The first XX pages of my manuscript are pasted below. 

Okay, and now here are my thoughts after a few read-throughs:

Dear Super Fantastic Agent, 

Sera is the [If this is YA, we need an age here] heiress to the throne in a different dimension, but no one told her.  Consequently, she’s living a normal—albeit, boring—life, and then she’s whisked away by a (very rich and very attractive) guy, who then turns out to be an incubus, working for an evil queen, who is also Sera’s mother. [This is a lot of information in a kind of long sentence. I'd like to see the first sentence, which is just a little confusing and not as big of a hook as I think you'll need, combine with some information in the other sentences. I'm a big fan of the "When X happens, Y happens" format for the first line in queries. Here's an example: "When eighteen-year-old Sera, heiress to the throne of a different dimension, is whisked away from her home by a very hot guy, she thinks she's hit the royal jackpot. But when he turns out to be an incubus (maybe a different word for this, unless it's relevant to the story. I have no idea what it is or if it's good or bad?) working for an evil queen—who just happens to be Sera's mother—she must choose between blah blah blah and blah blah blah. Anyway, that's just a suggestion :)]

Sera’s ‘parents’ also forgot to mention they’re actually rebels from Naian—the dimension Sera should be ruling—who stole her when she was an infant  [Something about this is a little confusing. I thought Sera's mother was the evil queen? So the evil queen is her real mother and the people that have been raising her are the rebels? I think this could be clearer. Maybe this: "Sera discovers the people she thought were her parents are actually rebels from Naian, the dimension Sera was born to rule, and they've stolen her right out from under the queen's claws...etc.] .  Oh, and there’s this ‘Foretelling,’ [colon here instead of a comma, I think. It'll give it more punch.] something Lucifer [Who's Lucifer? Is it literally the devil in your story, or just someone named that? A little clarification here, even something like "something the devil himself made up...]  made up giving Sera the sole power to decide the outcome of Naian’s civil war.  Too bad everyone believes it’s true and is therefore trying to either kiss her ass or kill her. [Is Sera discovering this stuff about herself as she figures out she's realizing she should be ruling Naian? Otherwise, how would she know she's supposed to decide the outcome of the civil war, or how would people know she has this ability? I think just a simple "When Sera goes back to her home dimension, she finds that she has the sole power to decide the outcome... blah blah.]

While she’s on this self-discovery kick [Love this!], she also learns that she has an alien guy fetish.  First the incubus, then her rebel friend, Lux, who she meets on an interdimensional race against the regime for an explanation of the Foretelling.  Between solving riddles, facing monsters, traipsing all over hell [Oh, okay, so we're probably talking about the original Lucifer then. Can you let stupid people like me know that? :)], and surviving the attacks of Queen Anicetus’ [You didn't use her name above, so I wouldn't use it now. "The queen's attacks" would do just fine.] vicious incubus, Sera and Lux get pretty hot for each other.

But, that’s the other problem.  The incubus.  The dark, sarcastic, damn-near-invincible incubus who oozes sex appeal and never loses.  His name is Lord Caden, and he has a thing for Sera. u[I think this paragraph and the one above can be stitched together. A simple line at the end of the paragraph above will help connect the love triangle all in one paragraph: Maybe something like, "But even so, Sera still can't shake the dark and dangerous sex appeal of the incubus who stole her, and as she grows closer to Lux, the incubus never strays far from her thoughts.]

Though she’d rather not, Sera does have [must] to choose between them [not necessary]—between Lux and Lord Caden, between the rebellion and the crown.  To some, it’d be obvious: monstrous regime = no go.  But Sera’s still a little annoyed [I think she'd have to be more than a little annoyed. I know you put that in there for the "voice" factor, and it would have worked, I think, if an entire dimension wasn't at stake here, haha. I think she needs to be more than a little annoyed to sacrifice an entire world, right? So you can still do the voice thing, but maybe change it to something like "super pissed" etc.] with the people who lied to her for eighteen years, and there’s also the Lux/Lord Caden thing, which she would love to write off as an unimportant factor in deciding the fate of an entire world, but she can’t.  Her morality, her friendships, her future, and the liberation of a dimension may be at stake here, but Sera doesn’t know if she can resist Lord Caden. u[I need a bit of a stronger reason to believe that Sera would eff up a whole dimension for Lord Caden. Something like "...if she can resist Lord Caden and the promises he holds." would sufffice.] 

SHADOW is a YA fantasy complete at 97K, and it is the first in a planned series.
I am a black belt and a barista.  I also write stories for local papers in western Montana, and I attended the Backspace Writers Conference last year.  The first XX pages of my manuscript are pasted below. 

And that's it! Sorry for the obnoxious orange above; I don't like to critique a piece without giving a reason why it doesn't work and also a suggestion for what might work better. Hence the word overflow above. And remember, these are just my opinions. Obviously, keep what works for you and change what doesn't. I'm not the end-all, be-all of query writing!

Alright Secret Lifers, can you help this awesome writer out? Any suggestions for how to make this query shine even more? Are there things that I missed? 

Valentine's Day Make Us Swoon Finalists!

Update: Entry #5 is the winner! You should have received an email from secret.life.of.writers@gmail.com by now; if not--please contact us! Thanks so much to everyone who participated in the contest. Happy Valentine's Day!

Thanks so much to everyone who entered our contest! We had LOTS of fabulous entries, and narrowing it down to just five was definitely not an easy task. But here we are, five wonderfully swoon-worthy scenes for you to read a vote for! Leave your votes in the comment box, and please only choose one entry! Voting ends at MIDNIGHT TONIGHT!

The winner will be announced first thing tomorrow morning, and will soon be followed our second round of SeCrits! (So in other words, be sure to come back and see us tomorrow too!)

And without further ado...

Entry #1

She always arrives late and even when he's not looking, he can sense her through a curious magnetism, a pole invisible inside of him realigning to match the one in her, electric fields shivering when she gets close. 

He can't keep doing this, not for seven more weeks. When she moves to get the voltmeter, she litters the air around her with the stray sparks of her scent and he's gone. They're assigned lab partners, and he's probably just static to her anyway, a one-second hush on the radio band she sometimes dances to when she thinks he's not paying attention. 

She asks for the ruler. He tries to hand it to her, but when his fingers brush hers the electricity turns his spine into a live wire and he jolts, dropping it. 

"My bad." Her lips quirk into a half-smile and she picks it up. This is how she crackles herself into his daydreams class after class: he'll replay this in his head until he's worn the memory raw. "Sorry! That's like the third time I've staticked someone today." 

He waves it off and doesn't realize he sounds like a total idiot until after he finishes saying that it's totally fine, really, and that she should feel free to shock him whenever she wants. Then the words race back to him and he shudders, face flushed, trying to conceal the fact that he is being slowly consumed from the inside out, even as her laughter singes into his skin.

Entry #2 

Setup: 17yo Marilla and her boyfriend, Chris, who are both wizards, have been discussing college plans. Since Marilla wants to study engineering while Chris wants to study magic, they would have to go to different colleges.

“Me? An accountant,” Chris laughs and pulls me into his arms, brushing his lips across my forehead. I try but fail to concentrate on his words, my attention zeroing in on the touch of his lips. “Thank you, Marilla. I’m glad to know you’d be there for me even if I was something so boring. But trust me when I say being a wizard is all I’ve ever wanted.”

“Hmmm,” I respond, enraptured by his fingers tracing my shoulder blade. “That’s good.”

“Yes, it is,” he says. “And you know getting a foundation at a first-rate Norm engineering school isn’t a terrible idea at all. And maybe, you could come here for grad sch…” I cut his sentence short, leaning up and kissing him hard.

He staggers back into the wall. I press against him, not letting up. I slide my hands up his chest, feeling the strength of his muscle beneath his t-shirt. A part of me wishes it wasn’t there, that I could feel the smooth skin underneath, but the other half of me is focused on his lips, on the taste of his mouth, unable to comprehend that anything could ever be so sweet. 

“Get a room!” Someone shouts, and I jump back, my face flushing. Chris doesn’t move away from the wall, staring at me with wide eyes as he tries to catch his breath. My flush deepens. I did that. I literally took his breath away. I’m somehow proud and embarrassed at the same time.

Entry #3

From my Upper MG science fiction, thirteen-year-old Gary, who has been abducted by aliens and gifted the power of telekinesis, has just used his ability to retrieve a pillow tucked tightly inside the hand of his teenaged, alien trainer, Esther.

Esther sucked in a breath, opened her hand, and stared at the red burn mark on her palm.

Before she could say anything, Gary spoke up, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to be so rough.” He took her wrist and inspected the red marks in her palm. With his free hand he touched the tips of his fingers to his lips then laid them gently in her palm. He folded her fingers over his and gazed into her eyes. “All better.” He smiled.

Esther blinked, a look of surprise forming on her face. “Yes, that feels much better now.” Her shimmering lips curled upward causing a dimple to appear on her right cheek.

Her happiness made Gary feel like he was floating, like nothing bad could ever change this one moment. Though he didn't know why, he leaned in closer and closer, time crawling by. Her exotic, floral scent filled his nose and intoxicated him. His mouth went dry as he brushed her cheek with a gentle kiss.

When Gary regained control of his frozen muscles, he pulled back immediately and looked away from Esther, cheeks burning. His stomach knotted with regret. Did I just ruin our friendship?

Her hand lightly touched his shoulder. Calm washed over him, his nerves eased, and the knot in his stomach untwisted. He turned to her, surprised to see her still smiling. It was infectious. He tried to hide the giant grin erupting. She's happy, so maybe I didn't mess anything up. What does this mean?

Entry #4 

This is from my WiP, and it's after Merrin and Elias have gotten in a fight. He's gone off to his room alone,  fallen asleep, and had lots of freaky dreams.

“Shh. Elias, it’s okay.” Her soft voice is sweet and warm but oh, God,
how did Merrin get into this dream? Cool fingers trail down the side
of my face, and my breaths slow. 

“There. There. It’s okay.” 

My eyes drift shut. “Merrin.” I croak in a whisper. “How did you…” 

“Daniel’s hack, remember?” 

Her body presses flush against mine, and I vaguely wonder how she got

in here without me noticing at the same time that I know I don’t
actually give a shit.  

My eyes have adjusted to the dark, and now I can see gray-on-gray in
relief. The delicate outline of her nose, her dark eyelashes blinking
at me. She props herself up on her elbow, keeping her body against
mine, letting her other hand trail down my neck and rest on my chest.
She is so sure, so steady. So definitely here, with me, despite what I
said to her. 

My eye trains down to her her shoulder, perfectly round and starkly
white. My brain wraps around one overwhelming thought - I hate the
thin strap that runs between her shoulder and her collarbone more than
anything else in the world right this moment. Somehow, I nod my head
in answer to her question. 

She leans down and kisses my forehead. She’s never done that before,
but God, I never want her to stop. The way her throat curves down over
my lips… 

She pulls back, looking down at me again. “We’re going to be okay.”

Entry #5

My chest heaves from the run, my shirt soaked on both sides. I catch my breath and weigh my options. He approaches: ten feet away, then five. At three feet, I fling my last balloon and fall to the ground, hoping to take him by surprise, hoping his return throw sails over my head. My balloon hits, bursting just above his collar bone and spraying up against his neck.

He laughs. His balloon? Still in his hand.

"Oh, you've asked for it now."

"Oh shit," I say, rolling into a ball and covering my head.
The grass rustles as Eric steps toward me. He's right over me, waiting for me to move.

"Come on. Get it over with. I surrender.”

"You do?"
I uncurl and nod. He kneels and reaches for my hand, pulls me up to my knees. My chest brushes against his.
My skin shivers, and I don't even try to pretend it's from the wet T-shirt. I let my body fall against him, press against him. He drops my hand and puts his arm around me. I feel his pulse through his fingertips on the small of my back. I fight the need to blink.

Then there's a pop. A fresh cold drips down my face, my shoulder, my back.

"You dirty rat. You tricked me.”

"Payback," he whispers.

His hand finds my face, pulls me closer, tips my head back, slides over my cheek. His lips are there. Right there.

Alright readers, take it away! You have one vote, so choose wisely! :) 

Friday Fun: Valentine's Day Make-Us-Swoon Contest!

Happy Valentine's Day lovelies!

Okay, so it's a little early, but we've got so much awesomeness already planned for next week (SeCrits! Awesome Author visit!) that we thought we'd go ahead and start spreading the love a little bit early.

ALL YOU NEED IS LOVEEE

I hope you all have someone special to spend this Valentine's with, but if not--hey, that's what our secret book boyfriends (or girlfriends!) are for, right? Right. With that in mind, we thought we'd have a little contest to celebrate YOU and your most swoon-worthy creations. So here are the details:

-You have until SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 10th at 10:00 P.M. EST to submit up to 250 of your most swoon-worthy words. They can be from a completed manuscript or a WIP, and they can feature a kiss, a spark, a declaration of love--whatever you think is most likely to make your fellow blog readers sigh longingly or perhaps need a cold shower after reading. 

-Send said words to: secret.life.of.writers@gmail.com. Feel free to include a line or two of summary to lead into your 250 words, if you feel it's necessary (but ONLY a line or two!)

-We'd like to keep this blog suitable for readers of all ages, so please consider that when submitting 

-On Monday, we will anonymously post up to five of the entries. If we get more than five entries, which I suspect we will because you all seem like a bunch of lovely romantics, then we will narrow it down to our top five choices and post those.

-Now, here's the fun part: THE PRIZE! On Monday, everybody gets to read the smexy and then vote for their favorite entry! The one with the most votes will win a SECRET VALENTINE'S DAY PRIZE PACK filled with lots of goodies, including this useful little book for your writing shelf:

And there's a good chance that chocolate of some sort will be involved as well ;)  So polish up those words and submit, submit, submit! I can't wait to read!

Stefanie Gaither writes YA novels about killer clones and spaceships, with the occasional romp with dragons and magic-users thrown in for good measure. Said writing is generally fueled by an obscene amount of coffee and chocolate, as well as the occasional tennis and/or soccer break. She's represented by Sara Megibow of Nelson Literary, and her debut novel, FALLS THE SHADOW, is forthcoming from Simon and Schuster Books For Young Readers in 2014.

You can find her on Twitter @: https://twitter.com/stefaniegaither

Or drop her an email at: stefanie.gaither@gmail.com

And also visit her website @: www.stefaniegaither.com 

Learning How to Write Great Fiction by Heather Marie

There was a time in my writing where I really felt like I didn't quite understand certain aspects on how to execute a story. I had to admit to myself that I needed help understanding dialogue tags and how much description and settings was really needed, as well as help with properly showing character emotion. I knew that my first few manuscripts were seriously lacking and, to me, they were just practice books anyway. With each one I was growing as a writer but I couldn't deny that my writing was in a slump.

It was really eating at me for the longest time and I realized I needed to do some research to fully understand what I was missing. One day after work I stopped by Barnes and Noble to pick up a few books on writing. Everyone recommended On Writing by Stephen King and Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott. I don't doubt that those books are amazing but after looking at them, I knew they weren't the kind of books I was looking for. But what I did find is this wonderful collection called Write Great Fiction.

You can find them here.

What I love about these books is how they break down everything little by little (almost like a Writing for Dummies sort of a thing) and they help you understand the steps to portraying a solid story. Each books gives examples and even some exercises at the end of each chapter to really make the concept click in your head. These were by my side the whole time I was writing DROWNING BAILEY and that manuscript just so happened to be the one that nabbed an agent. I should also mention that I had some awesome CPs that helped me make DB a clean manuscript, but I can't deny how much the story improved after studying these books. I still have them and turn to them when needed and recommend them to every fiction writer. 

I swear by these books and I think you will too. 

Kelsey's Writing Prompt Monday

So here on Secret Life we want to interact with everyone! We want to engage, grow, have fun. Now I feel like I'm standing in front of a classroom, so I'm sorry about that, but anyway. Here's how it works. You stare long and hard at the image I've picked out, and write something. Anything. A paragraph, a poem, a short story, a conversation, or just a simple description. The purpose is to get some down on the page. After all... we're writers. We're supposed to write at some point, right?

And remember. This isn't about writing something perfect. The word choice can be off, the dialogue can be cheesy, the characters can be two-dimensional. Basically, feel free to suck. Prompts aren't about being awesome; they're about being productive. 

Without further ado... be inspired!

My (awful) piece:

I stand at the side of the road and gaze up at the church. It's been two years since I've been back. So much has changed. Everything has changed, really. The bricks are charred, the roof caved in, and  the wind carries the forlorn feeling of a thing forgotten. By all appearances, no one survived. But I'm here anyway, because I have to know. 

I walk toward the doors.